And here we are.
What a long strange trip it's been.
Ian comes to pick me up and we head to Daniel Oduber Quiros International. Before I can pass through security I need to stop at the Covid testing tent for a rapid test. I fill out the paperwork and get the swab up my nose and head into the terminal to wait for my result. They say it will take an hour or less so it's just a waiting game at this point.
30 minutes comes and goes... 45 minutes... An hour... Hour:15.
Ok now what's going on here. I still have a good amount of time before my flight but I'd feel a little better on the other side of security. I go back out to the tent and ask about my test and when we look into it the results came back 45 minutes ago but the dope behind the counter entered my email address wrong. I mean how hard is andysjunkmail69@yahoo.com??
That's probably on me, I should have made sure he had it keyed in right. Trust but verify.
I take my passport & results to the ticketing counter and breeze on through security. I get on the plane to Yoostin and as luck would have it I have an entire row to myself. This is one of the few times I'll actually stretch out and relax on this trip.
I land at IAH and since I've been pre-approved for Global Entry I head to a special lane for my "interview." This consists of a dude ignoring me and clicking a bunch of stuff on his computer. He scans my fingerprints & asks if I've ever been arrested, at which point I tell him about a couple nights in Stillwater, OK during college where I didn't see eye to eye with their glorified mall cop police force. He says if that's it then I should be approved no problem - he's just waiting for my background check to come through, could take 10 minutes, could take 2 hours.
He then gives me the whole drunk-on-power "if I find something else when this background check comes back you're not gonna like it, is there anything else I should know about" number. Ok pal, I'm sure your girlfriend from high school is very impressed. Can I go now?
He reluctantly releases me from his kiosk and I receive an email that I've been approved 10 minutes later while eating a cinnabon. Well that was unnecessarily dramatic now wasn't it.
I hop on the plane for the short flight to Tulsa, where Timmy is waiting to ferry me home. I jump in and 15 minutes later we pull into the driveway. I trudge to my room where I drop my bags and flop into bed. My weary eyes close and so ends the final chapter to this epic tale. It's only a short respite from life on the road - my itinerary tomorrow begins with my tyres pointed north to Kansas City.
But that's just the life of a rambler.
Tale of the Tape
23 days
600 road miles
30 running miles
25 hiking miles
14 rafting miles
12 zip lines
11 accommodations
8 cities
7 modes of conveyance
6 breweries
5 beaches
4 airports
3 waterfalls
2.5 books
2 oceans
1 all around damn fine time